Charlie and Chocolate Factory

Rewiewed by the swearing film critic

Charlie And The Sodding Chocolate Factory is the story of a young boy named Charlie Bucket. Poor, Fucking tramp who eats shit. Charlie lives with his family in a shit heap ( much like jonny pickles ). The shit heap just happens to be next next to the legendary chocolate factory run by a Twat faced Pedo named Willy Wonka, who shut his doors to the public years ago... yet the candy is still mysteriously manufactured (Big Shit ). Then Wonka announces a contest that will allow only five children to ( get bummed ) Sorry enter the factory, Charlie wants to win more than anything. Meanwhile, spoiled and bratty children all over the world are finding the prized gold tickets in Wonka bars... until there is only one left.

The Oompa-Loompas no longer sing crap they sing fucking crap. They used to be fucked up but know its a little gimp from Amsterdam. There is loads of random shit and everyone slowly gets fucked off. Like the fat little fucking german, some rich girl that needs a good kicking, a little shit that needs throwing through a sodding TV and the girl that chews gum which later in life will be changed to sucking cock.

Then Charlie and Willie finally get it on, Share some Jesus juice and live in the Factory.

This film is the shit. Go watch it.